“We all have wings, but they have not been of any avail to us and if we could tear them off, we would do so.....” I can see Salvador Dali’s smile doesn’t agree with Franz Kafka’s statement...
“It is good taste, my dear Franz, and good taste alone that possesses the power to sterilize and is always the first handicap to any creative functioning.” With typical Dali arrogance, Salvador makes one of his sweeping statements, takes a long sip on his beer and waits for the reaction…
Franz, Salvador, Morrie and I are having our weekly discussion at the streetcorner café E Tyna in Prague. The midsummer heat of July 2009 tempts us to order the one cold Czech beer after the other. The discussion about life is also quite heated today …
Morrie: “Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn’t. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.”
“ Yes Morrie. Isn’t it strange that the things we sometimes love the most, also hurt us the most. I really feel that I am pulled back and forth between what I want to do and what I am currently doing. The paradoxes of life sometimes really create tensions I struggle to deal with…And yes, I will never take anything for granted. Yes, I have learnt that everything we get in life is a gift…Think it must be the privilege I have had growing up in a small town, Orkney… and later Boksburg. Haha… certainly not the town anyone wants to admit to having lived in. … and heaven forbids… admitting that I went to Voortrekker High School …mmm… not the most political correct admission to make on my CV… Luckily I haven’t had to compile a CV for over 18 years…. And I do not think I will ever need one in future.”
Morrie: “A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle.” “A wrestling match. Yes you could describe life that way.” “Which side wins?” “Love wins. Love always wins...”
“Love always wins, Morrie? I know I have wings to fly… and I don’t want to tear them off… and sometimes when I’m really scared I just think of some of my beautiful friends in South Africa… friends with wings…. Women who understand the secret life of bees, people who can spread their wings and fly…. Sometimes secretly… they win too Morrie...
You know the first thing I saw when I came to Prague was a graffiti inscription on a wall at the airport… it said…
A bird in search of a cage….
And guys…. that is exactly how I feel …. I wanna be like a bird….but only a very stupid bird would look for a cage “
You know the first thing I saw when I came to Prague was a graffiti inscription on a wall at the airport… it said…
A bird in search of a cage….
And guys…. that is exactly how I feel …. I wanna be like a bird….but only a very stupid bird would look for a cage “
Dali: “Surrealism is destructive, but it destroys only what it considers to be shackles limiting our vision. Maybe I must give you one of my paintings...”
“Mmm.. Salvador, I have to agree, I have come to the realization that I must re-imagine, that i must open my eyes again, do away with those things in my life that hinders me to do what I really want to do…. It is just,…. It is just that I do not really know if I can do it…how do you destruct for growth?”
Morrie:“The culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. And you have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn’t work, don’t buy it. Face yourself and...do it!”
“You are right Morrie, I think I have contributed to keeping this culture in tact. It doesn’t work anymore…. And even I don’t buy it anymore. Isn’t it interesting that we sometimes go out to create an idyllic utopian culture, but one day you wake up, and you realize that what you have created is sick in its core. That it makes you wanna puke just by looking at it. I understand what you mean with tension of opposites, …. pheeew... people you love as individuals... but they give you the creeps when they are together...Ajax mentality. Life is one big paradox!“
“The various forms of despair at the various stations on the road.....” - Kafka. This guy is right...
“ To face myself I have to change...This whole process of change, of creating a new reality, it really scares the shit out of me Franz. I am afraid man…what if I also end-up like the woman outside the cafe... I don't want to beg for a living"
Morrie: “If you hold back on the emotions–if you don’t allow yourself to go all the way through them—you can never get to being detached, you’re too busy being afraid. You’re afraid of the pain, you’re afraid of the grief. You’re afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails.”
“I am shit scared Morrie... If only I knew how to approach it. Salvador, sorry man, I know you are a very wise guy, but I think Morrie is better equipped to answer me on this one. This is very scary Morrie."
Morrie: “Of course it is...I am 78. I’m on the last great journey here–and you want ME to tell YOU what to pack...? ”
“Just some pointers Morrie… but please some concrete, rational stuff… airy fairy sometimes just doesn’t do it for me!”
Morrie: “You asked about caring for people I don’t even know. But can I tell you the thing I’m learning more with this disease? The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. Let it come in. We think we don’t deserve love, we think if we let it in we’ll become too soft. But a wise man named Levine said it right. He said, ‘Love is the only rational act...Love is the only rational act.”
Dali: “Franz, you now make surrealism something as solid, complete and classic as the works of museums….”
“ Love is a rational act? Giving it...and taking it? Morrie…huh?”
“The history of mankind is the instant between two strides taken by a traveler.....” After having not said much during the conversation, Franz lets rip with one of his famous one-liners again. Completely out of context as if he wasn't even part of the discussion. Yeah, I can feel he is just putting me in my place again… reducing my traveler status to a small footstep in time…a little movement in time...? I realize Franz must also show his superiority in being the only one in our group who have actually LIVED in Prague… is this what they call subliminal xenophobia?
Morrie, always ready to elaborate on one liners, picks up on the walking theme and says “So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they’re busy doing things they think are important.”
It is then that Franz shouts it out; “ The meaning of life is that it ends!” …then he sits back, contemplating the reaction he was going to get on this great insight. Am I not getting this?
Morrie obviously doesn’t agree: “This is because they’re chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”
We are all quiet for a few moments… you only hear sipping sounds….
“Another round, please waiter!!”
“Have you found someone to share your heart with? Are you giving to your community? Are you at peace with yourself? Are you trying to be as human as you can be?"
Even Salvador has to think about Morrie’s questions… the first time in a long time that I see him at a loss for words….tough questions...
Even Salvador has to think about Morrie’s questions… the first time in a long time that I see him at a loss for words….tough questions...
Franz; “Ja, Association with human beings lures one into self-observation......look at us, hey guys”
Dali, having regained his consciousness, tackles Franz with his sarcasm: “ Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it”
Very true, I think… but this guy obviously doesn’t believe it about himself and his work, or does he? I just want to travel around the world, drink coffee with my heroes, sleep in a hammock and build campfires under the stars ... these guys complicate things.. but they do make me think....
A long silence...and then Franz changes the topic. “Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old” Franz Kafka utters one of his famous one liners again…
“Yes guys, isn’t Prague beautiful, just look at it….” Me, not really knowing what to say, realizes that I could have just as well made an irrelevant statement about the weather… these guys are just in another league… but, sometimes simplicity can be powerful. So what the heck… “
Morrie: “Aging is not just decay, you know. It’s growth. It’s more than the negative that you’re going to die, it’s also the positive that you understand you’re going to die, and that you live a better life because of it.”“You know what that reflects? Unsatisfied lives. Unfulfilled lives. Lives that haven’t found meaning. Because if you’ve found meaning in your life, you don’t want to go back. You want to go forward. You want to see more, do more. You can’t wait until sixty-five.”
“ Hey Morrie. You are right, I don’t want to go back… I really like it being in my late fourties…. But heck man… I don’t want to be sixty yet… but yeah... I want to go forward… I want to pursue my dream….i WANNA DO MORE...FEEL MORE...LIVE MORE...”
Dali: “I do not paint a portrait to look like the subject, rather does the person grow to look like his portrait”
“ Well I am sure Dorian Gray won’t agree with you Salvador… remember how he felt it was so sad to grow old and horrid, and dreadful. But his picture always remained young. Remember he said:’ It will never be older than this particular day of June. . . . If it was only the other way! If it was I who were to be always young, and the picture that were to grow old! For this--for this--I would give everything! Yes, there is nothing in the whole world I would not give!"
“Dorian learnt the hard way…didn’t he? I actually enjoy getting older. Yes, not the pains and aches though… but the better insights, not being scared to say what I think and feel. Knowing that all of us are only human at the end…”
Morrie: “Love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone.”
Franz: “ By believing passionately in something that still does not exist, we create it. The nonexistent is whatever we have not sufficiently desired”
“… and creating is one of the most difficult things. It is so easy just to copy … so easy just to take what someone else has done and present it as your own…. But making something out of nothing. Now that is a challenge…. Mmm.. okay Salvador…. I know you are the exception… I am really trying to focus on my passions, which is music, the earth (damn, my honours degree in Geography must mean something) … hehe… and creation…. These three elements in unison… but how do I put it together into something that can create a new life for many people? … some questions are harder than others…. I can’t see the full picture guys, but I can feel it… I just know that I am onto something BIG here… but I need to believe it….”
Morrie: “Yes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people to trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too–even when you’re in the dark. Even when you’re falling.”
‘Ouch Morrie… this is where it gets tough man… hehe… I know I am on my way up, but it seems to others if I am on my down… it is difficult to explain but for the first time in a long time I know I am doing the right thing…the criteria has changed...and I believe it with my heart and soul… and I have been busy with putting it together for a few months now… but at some stage I need to share the reality… even though it is easy to hang onto the fantasy…”
Dali: “We are all hungry and thirsty for concrete images…. But….Painting is an infinitely minute part of my personality.”
“ I hear you Salvador…. But I am struggling to get to the painting bit here man…. I have all these plans and images in my mind…. A plethora of ideas… but to pull it all together and ‘paint” my “painting”…. That’s difficult man…. I need your help here guys!”
Morrie “Some people are so hungry for love that they accept substitutes. They embrace material things and expect a sort of hug back. But it never works. You can’t substitute material things for love or for gentleness or for tenderness or for a sense of comradeship. When you most need it, neither money nor power will give you the feeling you’re looking for, no matter how much of them you have.”
Dali: “Liking money like I like it, is nothing less than mysticism. Money is a glory!”.
Morrie:“If you’re trying to show off for people at the top, forget it. They will look down at you anyhow. And if you’re trying to show off for people at the bottom, forget it. They will only envy you. Status will get you nowhere. Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone.”
“You have a point Morrie…. Status never impressed me… and sorry Morrie.. I know you are a professor… but it your qualification doesn’t mean anything to me … I am impressed with your soul though…your human-ness... haha. That’s what makes me like you so very much…. Even though you are a learnered man, you are humble, but wise….with heart. Hehe… unlike some of us sitting here….” Wink, wink… Luckily Salvador knows I am only pulling his leg….or does he?
Morrie: “Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won’t be dissatisfied, you won’t be envious, you won’t be longing for somebody else’s things. On the contrary, you’ll be overwhelmed with what comes back.”
“ I have started trying it Morrie… and you know, since I have opened myself to the universe and to other people, specifically those out-of-the-box-ones, it is like a tornado of new ideas, people and love has come into my life… I must agree… I am completely overwhelmed with what has come back… and how what used to be important to me has become so irrelevant….”
Prague never ever lets you go... this dear little mother has sharp claws.......
Franz Kafka (1883-1924)
Franz Kafka (1883-1924)
“ Yes guys, I really enjoy our conversations… and where better to be than in this beautiful city…. Who would ever think that a guy from Orkney would get his most profound insights in life behind the iron curtain… how life has changed…”
Morrie: “Everyone knows they’re going to die, but nobody believes it. If we did, we would do things differently.”
… then everyone goes quiet… even Salvador nods his head… not that I think he would or should have done anything differently…. I just love eccentric people…and I love them just the way they are… I am so lucky to have so many Salvadores in my life…
For a second the discussion on the radio draws my attention “The rules of soccer are very simple, basically it is this: if it moves, kick it. If it doesn't move, kick it until it does” Phil Woosnam’s voice on the radio and then immediately followed by a waka waka sound that sounds familiar, but I realize it’s a song that is only supposed to be released in future, and it fades away in the background….
“Hey Guys… the soccer World Cup is going to be in South Africa next year… it is going to be such a success… it is going to mean so much for nation building in South Africa” … a young boy with a soccer ball in his head smile at us and then he disappears… why is it that I get this cynical feeling when I talk about soccer in Europe… funny… I also get this when I talk about rugby in South Africa… I wonder why? If it doesn't move.... kick it?"
But Morrie is unphased, he is in a very philosophical mood today…: “Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do”
“Huh”, I think, in South Africa we believe in the power of possibility… is he saying this because he is also one of those people who do not think we can pull it off? But Morrie has a point, in another context, I have learnt that I will never ever be able to understand accountants and how their minds work… mmm… come to think of it… I KNOW I cannot do accounting… and I know I will never ever be able to do it… I also know that I am only good with one thing… so maybe Morrie is right…”
“But guys, breaking from history is damn hard… damn, damn hard… re-framing my life is the hardest thing I have ever had to do….”
Morrie: “Accept the past as past without denying it or discarding it”; “Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others…Don’t assume that it’s too late to get involved.”
Dali: “Let my enemies devour each other. Mistakes are almost always of a sacred nature. Never try to correct them. On the contrary: rationalize them, understand them thoroughly. After that, it will be possible for you to sublimate them.”
“Jajaja…” (You know the Dutch JA, when you say one thing but you mean your mother) Sometimes we see one thing, but it also means another...
“Jajaja…” (You know the Dutch JA, when you say one thing but you mean your mother) Sometimes we see one thing, but it also means another...
Film....Opera....Koncert.....
Sometimes......what you see .....is what you don't get.....
Sometimes......what you see .....is what you don't get.....
Morrie: “There are some mornings when I cry and cry and mourn for myself. Some mornings, I’m so angry and bitter. But it doesn’t last too long. Then I get up and say, ‘I want to live . . .’”
Dali: “There are some days when I think I'm going to die from an overdose of satisfaction
Franz: “The meaning of life is that it stops”......
Morrie: “The truth is, once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.”
Jaroslav Seifert, the waiter, brings another round and steers the discussion in a different direction… “Prague is like a woman: tender and hard, capricious and deep as a well in which you can recognize your real face” Jeez, is this guy waitering while finishing his Phd?
Immediately Morrie latches on: “If you don’t respect the other person, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don’t know how to compromise, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. If you can’t talk openly about what goes on between you, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don’t have a common set of values in life, you’re gonna have a lot of trouble. Your values must be alike.” “And the biggest one of those values.” “Your belief in the importance of your marriage.”
He then continues: “There is no formula to relationships. They have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like.”
Where were all these clever guys when I needed them, I sit and think, This discussion is really getting interesting, and it is on a topic where I have failed miserably in my life…. Okay,…I had a good marriage for over 20 years… but I possibly never had the belief in the importance of marriage… I think… and yes, I was the asshole… but I am definitely not going to punish myself for the rest of my life for making a mistake… I need to pick up my head and live life!
Rainer Rilke, is on the front page of the newspaper….. the heading reads: “Prague is a miserable city of subordinate existences.....” Hope this guy is not planning to run for president…
Dali, also glimpsing the headline of the paper on the table, immediately personalizes it: “Democratic societies are unfit for the publication of such thunderous revelations as I am in the habit of making….”
Morrie: “Part of the problem, is that everyone is in such a hurry, People haven’t found meaning in their lives, so they’re running all the time looking for it. They think the next car, the next house, the next job. They find those things are empty, too, and they keep running.”
Dali: “In order to acquire a growing and lasting respect in society, it is a good thing, if you possess great talent, to give, early in your youth, a very hard kick to the right shin of the society that you love. After that, be a snob.”
Morrie: “Every society has its own problems, The way to do it, I think, isn’t to run away. You have to work at creating your own culture.”
“ Yes Morrie… one must run away, kick butt and create your own culture…”
Mol ast ranski Ha nsko edo od! (ancient Czech inscription)
Morrie: “One day, I’m gonna show you it’s okay to cry.”
A cage....?...a bird.....?
I cast my view over the bridge… and then I see it … a bird sitting on a cage...
Dali: “Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings”. He obviously also saw the bird.
Morrie agrees… his eyes focused on the bird: “Because, most of us all walk around as if we’re sleepwalking. We really don’t experience the world fully, because we’re half-asleep, doing things we automatically think we have to do….Well, the truth is, if you really listen to that bird ..., if you accept that you can die at any time–then you might not be as ambitious as you are.”
"But guys… I know we are all going to die one day… but I need to follow my heart… I need to dream big dreams… I need to do what I have always wanted to do…. I need to feel it.... I need to believe it!"
Morrie: “Do I wither up and disappear, or do I make the best of my time left?”
"Rhetorical, Morrie....Rhetorical?"
"Rhetorical, Morrie....Rhetorical?"
Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today
Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
Each morning when I awake, I experience again a supreme pleasure - that of being Salvador Dali. Progressive art can assist people to learn not only about the objective forces at work in the society in which they live, but also about the intensely social character of their interior lives. Ultimately, it can propel people toward social emancipation…
